Day 145-147
Sleeping location: Asheton Hotel, Lalibela, Ethiopia
Distance (km today/total): 0 / 10780
Estimated climb (m today/total): 0 / 74700
Christmas cheer: high
Distance (km today/total): 0 / 10780
Estimated climb (m today/total): 0 / 74700
Christmas cheer: high
Day in three words: The festive season
Christmas Day started with bathroom coffee and the acceptance that neither of us could be bothered with a hike today, as had been suggested. So we stayed in bed and opened the presents that Beth had brought us, which turned out to be some whisky and a snow globe. Rebecca then revealed that she had also bought a bottle of whisky in Mekele, but on opening it we realised that it was definitely fake. We added it to the coffee anyway, for extra Christmas cheer, then watched the rest of Django in bed before making calls with our families. It was lovely to see and speak with everyone, if a little homesickness-inducing. The hotel had a nice little garden where we could sit amongst the flowers and watch the birds do interesting things whilst waiting for the calls to buffer.
For dinner we went to a crazy Gaudi-esque restaurant on a hilltop on the edge of town, run by a Scottish lady called Susan, who had promised via email that they were doing a festive menu with actual trifle. We were amongst the first people there so we spent some time enjoying the amazing views and seemingly unlimited mulled wine until all the other farenji showed up. During this period we found and adopted a stick insect which Rebecca christened Charles Stickens. The evening consisted of a display of traditional Ethiopian music (which is, frankly, rubbish) followed by some not-very-Christmassy-but-still-quite-good food, followed by the much anticipated trifle, which was a delicious taste of home.
After the meal we were adopted by a great middle-aged German couple called Stephan and Stephanie (yes really), who had clocked that we were the only two sets of farenji without a guide. Stephan was a keen bike tourer himself, and Stephanie’s son had done Cape Town to Germany a few years before, so they were full of questions and stories and it was really fun talking to them. As they left they gave us their church tickets* which was an absolute win. We had a nightcap with a very merry Susan, who then gave us a lift home in her pickup (she wasn’t driving!) although we did have to sit in the back for the second time in two days.
Boxing Day saw us (me) waking up feeling pretty cloudy, but a breakfast beer and two coffees helped. After this we set off on a hike up to Asheton Monastery, way up the mountainside. The path wiggled up through town and then along the side of a ridge, with amazing views falling away to the right, before coming out on a plateau with a small village and almost 360 degree views. There was a really fun tree to climb, so I did, even though I am 33. The monastery was further up, through a dry riverbed and some pretty fields, but on arrival we were told that the entrance was 350 Birr pp, which was more than our hotel room, so we didn’t bother**.
On the way back down we were stalked by some annoying kids who just kept on shouting everything that they thought we might give them, including “pen”, “candy” (pronounced in a French accent), “biscuit” (pronounced basket), “bottle” and of course “money”, but then also tried to sell us an old photograph of some black ladies that they had somehow acquired. Further down two girls followed us and kept asking for money. When they finally left us alone I gave them a cheerful “bye bye” to which one of them replied angrily “no bye bye!”. Of course I then repeatedly shouted “bye bye” and waved vigorously at them until they were out of eyesight. The rest of the day was spent peacefully blogging in the lovely hotel garden, and also getting a mention of my journey on the Guardian’s live cricket coverage, which led to a couple of donations and made me very happy.
The next morning was spent doing bits and bobs like bike maintenance, blog and general relaxing. At lunch I spoke with a local guy who insisted that drinking beer on a fasting day*** was too wild because beer without meat is crazy, which must be a shock to many vegetarians. After putting it off for almost 3 days we then finally went to see the rock churches, using the black market ticket from Steph&Steph, which worked a CHARM. They were very impressive, though maybe more in execution than in spectacle. Inside they were pretty sparse, although to be fair that isn’t really the point. The best thing was the collection of rock-cut tunnels, passageways and staircases between them all. I guess they were totally unique and interesting and beautiful, but we were done within 2hrs so I would have been raging if I’d paid $50. On the way out a kid tried to sell me a wooden bull, then when I said no replied “give me trousers”. I pretended to take off my shorts, which confused him greatly before he realised what was going on and said “no buy me trousers from a shop”. I did not buy him trousers from a shop.
Back at the hotel Rebecca made some mulled wine, which was tasty, and I watched a documentary about cycling in the UK which made me miss cycling in the UK (The woods! The pubs! The friends! The cake!). We had a really weird dinner where the white wine was brown, the chicken burger appeared to contain no chicken and the chicken curry contained an egg and one small piece of the most intensely gamey chicken I have ever tasted. I suppose an egg is, technically, still a chicken. To cap off our time in Lalibela we went to an infamous tej bar, tej being Ethiopian honey wine that we hadn’t yet tried. It was nice, sort of sweet and sour and funky and sour all at once, but it was also pretty strong and made me feel “wobbly legs” drunk in the same way that West Country cider does. We had fun in Lalibela and it was a great place to spend Christmas, even if it was a total pain in the arse to get to (and, as it subsequently turned out, from).
*The rock churches of Lalibela are a spectacular sight, but operating on the “farenji = money” principle the tickets are ambitiously priced at $50 for five main churches. They are, however, valid for five days. We had been on the fence about paying so...this helped.
**A big sign said it would be $20, or about 600 Birr, from January 2020. They do love rinsing the tourists here.
***Wednesday and Friday are “fasting days” where everyone has to go vegan because God wants them to.
Christmas Day started with bathroom coffee and the acceptance that neither of us could be bothered with a hike today, as had been suggested. So we stayed in bed and opened the presents that Beth had brought us, which turned out to be some whisky and a snow globe. Rebecca then revealed that she had also bought a bottle of whisky in Mekele, but on opening it we realised that it was definitely fake. We added it to the coffee anyway, for extra Christmas cheer, then watched the rest of Django in bed before making calls with our families. It was lovely to see and speak with everyone, if a little homesickness-inducing. The hotel had a nice little garden where we could sit amongst the flowers and watch the birds do interesting things whilst waiting for the calls to buffer.
For dinner we went to a crazy Gaudi-esque restaurant on a hilltop on the edge of town, run by a Scottish lady called Susan, who had promised via email that they were doing a festive menu with actual trifle. We were amongst the first people there so we spent some time enjoying the amazing views and seemingly unlimited mulled wine until all the other farenji showed up. During this period we found and adopted a stick insect which Rebecca christened Charles Stickens. The evening consisted of a display of traditional Ethiopian music (which is, frankly, rubbish) followed by some not-very-Christmassy-but-still-quite-good food, followed by the much anticipated trifle, which was a delicious taste of home.
After the meal we were adopted by a great middle-aged German couple called Stephan and Stephanie (yes really), who had clocked that we were the only two sets of farenji without a guide. Stephan was a keen bike tourer himself, and Stephanie’s son had done Cape Town to Germany a few years before, so they were full of questions and stories and it was really fun talking to them. As they left they gave us their church tickets* which was an absolute win. We had a nightcap with a very merry Susan, who then gave us a lift home in her pickup (she wasn’t driving!) although we did have to sit in the back for the second time in two days.
Boxing Day saw us (me) waking up feeling pretty cloudy, but a breakfast beer and two coffees helped. After this we set off on a hike up to Asheton Monastery, way up the mountainside. The path wiggled up through town and then along the side of a ridge, with amazing views falling away to the right, before coming out on a plateau with a small village and almost 360 degree views. There was a really fun tree to climb, so I did, even though I am 33. The monastery was further up, through a dry riverbed and some pretty fields, but on arrival we were told that the entrance was 350 Birr pp, which was more than our hotel room, so we didn’t bother**.
On the way back down we were stalked by some annoying kids who just kept on shouting everything that they thought we might give them, including “pen”, “candy” (pronounced in a French accent), “biscuit” (pronounced basket), “bottle” and of course “money”, but then also tried to sell us an old photograph of some black ladies that they had somehow acquired. Further down two girls followed us and kept asking for money. When they finally left us alone I gave them a cheerful “bye bye” to which one of them replied angrily “no bye bye!”. Of course I then repeatedly shouted “bye bye” and waved vigorously at them until they were out of eyesight. The rest of the day was spent peacefully blogging in the lovely hotel garden, and also getting a mention of my journey on the Guardian’s live cricket coverage, which led to a couple of donations and made me very happy.
The next morning was spent doing bits and bobs like bike maintenance, blog and general relaxing. At lunch I spoke with a local guy who insisted that drinking beer on a fasting day*** was too wild because beer without meat is crazy, which must be a shock to many vegetarians. After putting it off for almost 3 days we then finally went to see the rock churches, using the black market ticket from Steph&Steph, which worked a CHARM. They were very impressive, though maybe more in execution than in spectacle. Inside they were pretty sparse, although to be fair that isn’t really the point. The best thing was the collection of rock-cut tunnels, passageways and staircases between them all. I guess they were totally unique and interesting and beautiful, but we were done within 2hrs so I would have been raging if I’d paid $50. On the way out a kid tried to sell me a wooden bull, then when I said no replied “give me trousers”. I pretended to take off my shorts, which confused him greatly before he realised what was going on and said “no buy me trousers from a shop”. I did not buy him trousers from a shop.
Back at the hotel Rebecca made some mulled wine, which was tasty, and I watched a documentary about cycling in the UK which made me miss cycling in the UK (The woods! The pubs! The friends! The cake!). We had a really weird dinner where the white wine was brown, the chicken burger appeared to contain no chicken and the chicken curry contained an egg and one small piece of the most intensely gamey chicken I have ever tasted. I suppose an egg is, technically, still a chicken. To cap off our time in Lalibela we went to an infamous tej bar, tej being Ethiopian honey wine that we hadn’t yet tried. It was nice, sort of sweet and sour and funky and sour all at once, but it was also pretty strong and made me feel “wobbly legs” drunk in the same way that West Country cider does. We had fun in Lalibela and it was a great place to spend Christmas, even if it was a total pain in the arse to get to (and, as it subsequently turned out, from).
*The rock churches of Lalibela are a spectacular sight, but operating on the “farenji = money” principle the tickets are ambitiously priced at $50 for five main churches. They are, however, valid for five days. We had been on the fence about paying so...this helped.
**A big sign said it would be $20, or about 600 Birr, from January 2020. They do love rinsing the tourists here.
***Wednesday and Friday are “fasting days” where everyone has to go vegan because God wants them to.
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