Maggie's Rambles

Sleeping location: Really nice airbnb in Bari old town Distance (km today/total): 134 / 3283 Estimated climb (m today/total): 300 / 23200 Km until first opportunity to sit down: 50 Day in three words: Western Europe: tick After a patchy night’s sleep on the spooky hillside, I was up and away early, keen to escape the bad juju of the place. As we were still in the badlands there was NOTHING, no coffee, no toilet, not even anywhere to comfortably sit down due to the remorseless flatness of the place, so I just kept going until I reached the first town 50km in. With the 30km yesterday evening this made 80km of total emptiness between towns. Thank goodness I can carry 4 litres of water. Having smashed out 50km by 10am, the rest of the day was a relaxed affair, spent in a joyous daze at the prospect of a) finishing a “chunk” of the trip, b) 4 rest days, and best of all c) seeing Rebecca this evening. It helped that the Adriatic road around here has been usurped by a shiny new versio

Sleeping location: Spooky hillside about 30km down the SP28 from Apricena, Italy Distance (km today/total): 174 / 3149 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1000 / 22900 Towns in 130km of riding: 3 Day in three words: Through the badlands Despite more ants in the overnight oats, we were up and out by 7 and smashing out the distance so Matt could catch his train*. This bit was along the SS16, a major road which runs over 1000km all down the Adriatic coast, from the top of the thigh of Italy to the tip of its stiletto heel. As such it was fast going, but not always pleasant as some bits were busy and the shoulder kept disappearing (classic Italy). It was cloudless and got very hot from about 10am. At 1pm we rolled into Termoli, Matt’s jumping-off point, and celebrated with a dip in the sea that was very well received. Termoli’s old town was surprisingly lovely and we had enough time for a wander around and a pizza before Matt rolled off for good. I set off alone and almost immediately

Sleeping location: The world’s loudest campsite, about 10km SE of Pescara Distance (km today/total): 147 / 2975 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1100 / 21900 Time to do 40km of descent: 1hr 05 Day in three words: Top to bottom After packing up we headed into the nearby village in search of coffee and food, and found a great little cafe/bar/corner shop run by a very friendly lady who took a shine to us. We got everything we needed for breakfast and lunch, plus wifi, toilet and device charging. Matt was originally impressed by her enormous peaches* but she said “very big, but no good” and pointed us to the excellent apricots also on offer. I was similarly impressed by the largest courgette I’d ever seen, which she proudly told me was from her garden. After this we climbed quite serenely up to the highest point of the Italy section of the trip, 1380m, where there was a giant reservoir that we had a nice little swim in. And after this, the descent. In terms of cumulative joy it was

Sleeping location: Some very spooky and muddy woodland near Scai in the Appenines Distance (km today/total): 91 / 2828 Estimated climb (m today/total): 2100 / 20800 Amount of day spent climbing: about 85% Day in three words: Short but steep A day short in distance but long in effort, through the Apennines as we head towards the Adriatic. The day started with the realisation that the lid had fallen off our overnight oats and ants had got in. Waste not want not, of course, so we just scooped the ants out and ate the non-anty bits. Probably worse than the ants was the juice we had made it with, some kind of weird pumpkin peach thing which did not work at all. I blame Matt. Matt soon redeemed himself with his route planning though. This was the best day of the trip so far, hard cycling but quiet roads and gorgeous scenery. The day went: comfortable climb, pleasant descent, coffee, hard climb, half sketchy half fun descent, lunch, moderate but long climb, amazing descent, short clim

Sleeping location: Some steep woodland a couple of km up the hill from Spoleto Distance (km today/total): 67 / 2737 Estimated climb (m today/total): 400 / 18700 Glorious lie-in until: 9am Day in one word and five sounds: Umbria, ia, ia, eh eh eh A “semi-rest” day which was much needed for tired legs. We relaxed in the apartment until 11, made some breakfast and then went for a look around Perugia for a couple of hours. It’s a mystery why Perugia isn’t rammed with tourists like some bits of Tuscany not far away - it’s absolutely delightful, with loads of history, steep winding streets, interesting street art, grand buildings and some amazing views down from the hilltop that the city sits on. All of this in the almost total absence of tourists. Perugia is amazing do not go there you will ruin it. We set off about 2pm for a short and mainly flat jaunt to Spoleto, along the fields of Umbria. Not much to report really. We hid from a thunderstorm in a conveniently located ice cream p

Sleeping location: An airbnb in the gorgeous old town of Perugia Distance (km today/total): 134 / 2670 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1200 / 18300 Number of bridges on the route of the seven bridges: 31 Day in three words: Under Tuscan sun A last big push before a semi-rest day tomorrow, and easier next few days after that. We packed up from our lovely little olive grove and set off along the Route of the Seven Bridges, which runs about 50km from Regello to Arrezo. This bit was absolutely wonderful cycling, with enough ups and downs to make it interesting but no big climbs. The route tacks along the hillsides via various cute little towns and impressive bridges, and because it’s well surfaced it was popular with other cyclists. Maybe because it was Sunday, or maybe because this was a less extreme route than the mountains yesterday, the cyclists were a lot more relaxed today and frequently rode in big sociable groups. We got loads of ciaos and thumbs up, and even managed to over

Sleeping location: An idyllic olive grove in Tuscany Distance (km today/total): 129 / 2536 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1900 / 17100 Number of cyclists faster than us: all of them Day in three words: Looks like Tuscany* *One for the Dulwich Hamlet fans The day started with a lovely dip in the river near our camp spot, with some nearby fisherman looking a bit confused at why a man in very tight shorts was frolicking in the water.  After that we started the long climb up out of this bit of the Apennines.  It took all morning but was relatively OK as there weren’t many mega steep bits.  After this we “greatly enjoyed” half of the big descent down a pretty sketchy bit of road (bad surface, bad visibility under the trees, very steep), then greatly enjoyed the second half on beautiful tarmac down winding (but not too winding) roads into Tuscany proper. A bit of flat later and we were in Florence, where we battled hoards of tourists and enjoyed a magnificent pizza restaurant wit

Sleeping location: By a river in the middle of the north Apennines, Italy Distance (km today/total): 134 / 2407 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1700 / 15200 Heart rate after initial climbs: 1000bpm Day in three words: Faff and fury Last night’s creature in the trees turned out to be (Matt swears) a wild boar. He never saw it, but its snuffling noises kept him awake and scared for a few hours whilst I slept safely and soundly in my tent. It rained on my face a bit at about 4am, but it felt quite nice so I ignored it and went back to sleep. When the rain came back a bit heavier I gave up and went out to put the tent’s outer on, at which point the rain stopped for good. The first 50km was along boring and busy roads. We somehow took until 2pm to do it, despite waking up at 6am, because of loads of interesting and complicated types of faff. This meant the rest of the day was quite squeezed, which was bad because it involved a lot of climbing after we left the Po delta and went up

Sleeping location: Behind some hay bales about 10km outside Parma Distance (km today/total): 166 / 2273 Estimated climb (m today/total): 300 / 13500 Tomatoes seen: 1 billion Day in three words: Fields and fields A hot flat day across the Po delta, where much of Italy’s farming is done. Met Matt at Milan station after a brief delay whilst I waited for the thunderstorm to stop (the curse of rain in a new country continues).  Had two coffees, two large pastries and three scoops of ice cream while we talked about our route across Italy.  One of the best things about cycle touring is that this is a totally reasonable, and perhaps even sensible, breakfast. Matt and I are riding down Italy from Milan to Bari over the next week, although Matt will get the train for the last 200km as he has to be in Bari earlier than me (and this is a flat boring bit of the route). Today we committed to smashing out some big distance over flat terrain to make things easier for the next few days. The rou

Sleeping location: B&B Hotel Milano Distance (km today/total): 175 / 2107 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1100 / 13200 Temperature swing during the day: 25 degrees Day in three words: Locarno isn’t Lugano The day started with me all cosy in the marquee, and getting up and putting on my still wet cycling gear was not fun. Made good time early on through some beautiful scenery, down a river valley with huge cliffs either side and dozens of waterfalls after yesterday’s rain. Lots of pretty towns too, and I saw some ibex hanging out in a field. This was probably my favourite bit of Switzerland.  By 9am it was clear that Switzerland had pulled an Alsace and followed torrential rain with a scorcher the next day. The day’s defining mishap happened mid morning. I had heard of Locarno and Lugano, but just assumed they were the same place as they have such similar names*. I knew I needed to go to “that place”, so when I saw bike route signs for Locarno I deviated from the major rout

Sleeping location: A temporary marquee at the back of FC Faido’s ground Distance (km today/total): 123 / 1937 Estimated climb (m today/total): 2100 / 12100 Hours to climb the Gotthard Pass: 5 Day in three words: Alpine mountain? Pass. A tough, tough day for two reasons: incessant heavy rain, and crossing the Alps.  But let’s do things as they happened. The day started inauspiciously as I quickly realised that I’d camped in someone’s garden as a result of following a google maps “path” (which wasn’t).  It turned out I was the wrong side of signs saying “no right of way” or some such, and also “mind the dogs”.  Because I’d come from the other side due to the “path” I hadn’t seen them.  I got up and left as quickly as possible, pausing only to flick away the ridiculous number of slugs that had crawled onto my stuff overnight.  A lot of stuff was wet but I thought I’d dry it out later, HA HA HA. Had a pleasant dip in the Zugersee then stopped at a cafe for some mega blog updating

Sleeping location: Some kind of orchard just outside Zug Distance (km today/total): 115 / 1814 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 700 / 10000 Number of working phones: 1 Day in three words: Fuss and bother Wall to wall admin today, it’s a miracle I managed to fit so much distance in really.  The day started with the delight of a flat tyre, which set my leaving back by half an hour.  I was initially really annoyed that my “puncture proof” Schwalbes had punctured, but it turned out to be a defect with the inner tube, which is slightly better. Set off with Dave and Ollie who both fancied a bit of a ride.  Picked up a new phone, which is not as good as my old phone but was at least relatively cheap.  The rest of the day involved searching for WiFi wherever possible in order to restore backups etc on both devices.  This was SO MUCH admin but it is too boring to go into here. In between admin the cycling was quite nice.  Ollie and Dave headed off after about 25km and 45km respectively

Sleeping location: Dave and Dominique’s house just outside Basel Distance (km today/total): 130 / 1699 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 300 / 9300 Alice is: 1 Day in three words: Fuck you Alsace As if yesterday’s 3hr rainstorm wasn’t enough, Alsace today decided to treat us to 31 degree temperatures, high humidity and sunshine punctuated only by the odd thunderstorm, plus an unrelenting headwind all afternoon.  This made the going really tough, especially as we didn’t leave until the hottest part of the day due to my faffing and general phone malaise.  I think it’s safe to say it’s definitely broken now, it kept trying to turn itself on during the night, but couldn’t get past the first screen.  Eventually it got so tired it gave up. A lot of the way today was along the Rhine/Rhône canal, which was nice except I just wanted to jump in it and couldn’t, anywhere, because it was “dangerous” and “dirty”.  Stupid canal.   Eventually we made it to Dave and Dominique’s house in Basel

Sleeping location: “Camping Wagelrott” about 25km south of Strasbourg Distance (km today/total): 190 / 1569 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 400 / 9000 Number of working phones: 0 Day in three words: Wet phone woes A pretty boring day until the events of the last couple of hours.  Left Mannheim a bit later than expected and cycled 20km to Speyer (quite nice) to meet Craig, and a horde of wasps, for a farewell coffee.  Thereafter followed about 140km of utter tedium.  No interesting towns, no interesting scenery, quite near the Rhine but not really near enough for it to be interesting.  This being the case, we just cycled and cycled as there was nothing else to do and our legs felt fresh after the rest. About halfway through the day we passed into France, but it continued to be really boring, just in a slightly more Gallic way.  Pretty soon the curse of the new country struck.  The previous two times I have come into a new country on this trip it has rained within an hour or so,

Sleeping location: “Tim’s” bang-average airbnb, Mannheim Distance (km today/total): 0 / 1379 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 0 / 8600 Hours of beautiful rest: 58 Days in three words: Beer, kebab, cigars Two days spent with Craig and Toni in and around Mannheim.  Took it very easy after the previous days’ efforts, which was very well received. Highlights include: -Mannheim itself, which is quite interesting and has some nice bits.  It also has a large Turkish population, which means there is an area with countless* great kebab restaurants, which we took full advantage of -Having a bit of a bender on Thursday, involving a fun little bar, a fun little restaurant (where I had some fantastic calf’s liver) and staying up until 3am drinking beers and smoking cigars on the balcony -A day trip to Heidelberg, which is lovely, if a little twee -Me forgetting the word for “youths” and accidentally saying “die Juden”** loudly in a bar -Learning that the German for coati (a little raccoo

Sleeping location: “Tim’s” bang-average airbnb, Mannheim Distance (km today/total): 152 / 1379 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 300 / 8600 Castles on the Rhine between Koblenz and Bingen: >40 Day in three words: Rhine and shandy A final* big day which was actually only meant to be about 135km but somehow turned into 150+ again. This means that since leaving London I have done a ludicrous 758km in 5 days (Toni has only done 742, pathetic).  The first month up to Bari was always going to feel a bit punchy because of the fixed start/end dates, and I’m definitely looking forward to a more relaxed timetable in September.   The Rhine cycle path redeemed itself with a lot of gorgeous sections in the morning, all green hills and castles, and the afternoon parts would have been nice if not for a nagging headwind and running out of water for 20km. The sun was shining all day and I have developed some fantastic tan lines - deep brown on the lower legs, face and lower arms, bright re

Sleeping location: "Camping Lorleyblick" about 40km south of Koblenz Distance (km today/total): 158 / 1227 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 400 / 8300  Maximum uninterrupted stretch of perfect Rhine cycleway: 1km Day in three words: Germany, it's complicated Yet another big day in the push for Mannheim (possible WW2 novel?), which we have chosen to make harder by going a longer but nicer route.  Still, we are going well and chewing up the miles without too much trouble. Started the day by accidentally wild camping, since there was nobody around at last night's campsite either the night before or the morning after, so we couldn't pay. There was a lock on the toilet block anyway, so all we actually did was squish their grass a bit for about 9 hours. On to Koln for a breakfast kolsch, then met Toni's friend Michael in Bonn for a coffee and a cake. About this stage the Rhine cycle path started to show its face. It was absolutely fantastic... sometimes. Th

Sleeping location: "Camping service Berndt Bast" about 15km outside Koln Distance (km today/total): 162 / 1067 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 200 / 7900 Litres of rain absorbed by clothing during storm: 25 Day in three words: Holland uber Deutschland A mega day in an attempt to knock off substantial kms to make the next couple of days easier in our quest to reach Mannheim by Wednesday evening.  Scenery very uneventful again, although there was one hill (actually more of a slight rise) in the afternoon. Had breakfast in a small town called Veghel, which was great for two reasons.  First, they were in the middle of "construction village", where all the kids were building cabins out of pallets with (minimal) assistance from adult helpers, which they would then go on to sleep in later in the week. Second, we had breakfast at a cafe which supported kids with Downs Syndrome and employed adults with learning difficulties, all of whom seemed really happy to work th

Sleeping location: Green Donk campsite near 's-Hertogenbosch (yes really to both of those names) Distance (km today/total): 127 / 905 Estimated climb (m today/toal): 300 / 7700 Number of waterfowl seen: ∞ Day in three words: Dutch stereotype generator All the cliches are true: odd place names, pancake flat landscape, a constant 30kph wind, wonderful cycling infrastructure, loads of water, loads of ducks and geese, bitterballen. All enjoyed/tolerated in spades today.  The going was actually pretty tough due to the constant wind coming from the side, meaning that you either had a nagging headwind or a weak tailwind depending on the exact direction of travel. Other things were better, mostly to do with the cycle lanes. Maybe 5% of today was spent on normal roads; the rest was all cycle lanes, mostly segregated. The Dutch do this so well and as a result EVERYONE cycles. It's great to see an old woman with her dog in the basket or a kid on his way to hockey practice, both cy

Sleeping location: Cabin on the ferry from Harwich to Hook of Holland Distance (km today/total): 157 / 778 Estimated climb (m today/total): 800 / 7400 Speed of tailwind (kph): 65 Day in three words: Goodbye perfidious Albion So here we go, the real adventure starts now that I’m leaving the UK. To be honest I’ll be glad to get away from all the negativity and maliciousness that seems to have been the country’s base setting for the past three and a half years.  That said, I will miss the beer, and made sure to have one last pint of ale on the run into Harwich.   Today was a long long day, but Brexit Britain seemed to be happy to get rid of another member of the liberal metropolitan elite (unemployed, homeless, reads the Guardian) and supplied us with a 65kph tailwind for basically the whole way.  Picked up Toni on the way through London, she’ll be with me until Basel in a week’s time.  By “picked up” I mean “met with”, I didn’t just enlist a stranger to cycle 1000km through Midd

Sleeping location: Rebecca’s house, Richmond upon Thames Distance (km today/total): 0 / 621 Estimated climb (m today/total): 0 / 6600 Beers drunk (est): 25 Day in three words: Massive beer festival Nothing to see here

Sleeping location: Rebecca’s house, Richmond upon Thames Distance (km today/total): 129 / 621 Estimated climb (m today/total): 700 / 6600 Interesting things seen: 0 Day in three words: Commuter belt dreariness A flat and boring day with the sole aim of getting to Richmond in time for a dinner date (success!).  The scenery switched from “pastoral English fields” to “endless dull suburbs” around Basingstoke, 50km in, and never switched back.  It’s also noticeable how much worse the driving becomes the closer you get to London, everyone seems to be in a rush to get to the shops/hairdressers/pet cemetery  and there were some desperate overtaking manoeuvres. The one saving grace was a nice towpath along the Basingstoke canal, which I hadn’t previously been aware of. It wasn’t quick (at one stage I raced a dragonfly and the dragonfly won) but it was quiet and stress free.  It went on for so long that I actually switched back to the road for the last 10km, just to feel a bit of speed.

Sleeping location: YHA Cholderton, near Stonehenge Distance (km today/total): 150 / 492 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1100 / 5900 Average gradient of the last 500m of the climb to Alfred’s Tower: 14% Day in three words: Levels and ramps A long day done mostly solo after I left the LEJoG crew near Bridgwater and headed east.  The route was mostly very pleasant but unmemorable, with lots of rolling hills and leafy lanes as I slowly moved from the West Country into whatever this bit of England is called. The first half was on the Somerset Levels and was very...level...and the second half was through Wiltshire and a bit more punchy.  The two bits of the journey that stand out were both extremely unpleasant: First, a ludicrous climb up to “Alfred’s Tower” which I accidentally included in the route when I replanned after lunch.  The whole thing was 2.3km at 6.6%, which is bad enough, but the last 500m averaged 14% and at times was a lot steeper.  This was worse than anything so fa

Sleeping location: Beambridge Inn, Wellington Distance (km today/total): 92 / 342 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1250 / 4800 Sheep to car ratio: 50:1 Day in three words: Exmoor & up yonder* *The ampersand is a symbol An easier day, but one which still involved a lot of punchy climbs and one from sea level up to almost 500m.  The LEJoG team decided to go a more direct/flat route than initially planned, but I decided to stick to the original route as I fancied checking out Exmoor. In the end I was very glad I did because it was great and they still ended up doing as much overall climb and distance as me, but on much busier roads (haha). I went down the rest of the Tarka Trail with them to Barnstaple, then started the long ascent up to the top(ish) of the moors on my own.  Stopped at a fantastic pub called the Poltimore Arms on the way up. The owner Steve was great value, the place was about 600 years old and has no mains electricity, gas or phone.  Sadly it was too early

Sleeping location: Durrant House Hotel, Bideford Distance (km today/total): 111 / 250 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1500 / 3550 Chain failures: 1 Day in three words: Break the chain Today was all about the chain. In fitting Maggie up for the big journey I installed some new, wide mudguards. They turned out to be so wide that the chain actually touched then in some gears, so my dad and I cut a slot out of them and thought that would be ok. In fact the slot was too low down, and in certain gear shifts the chain was catching on the nice sharp corner we added by removing a section of mudguard. The morning was filled with some very concerning noises, vibrations and chain skips, until a steep hill around lunchtime when the chain (about 200km old) gave up entirely and snapped. Turns out Fleetwood Mac were wrong. We made it rideable using a split link, but the chain itself was absolutely fucked and created a horrible grating sound whenever I turned the pedals. As the nearest bike sh

Sleeping location: Westberry hotel and Thai Restaurant, Bodmin Distance (km today/total): 114 / 139 Estimated climb (m today/total): 1700 / 2050 Brake pad failures: 1 Day in three words: Cornwall you bitch A hard day (look at that climb per km!!) thanks to Cornwall’s unique take on “lumpy”. Basically endless 50m climbs at about 8% with no run-in. The elevation chart of the day looks like a seismograph. My untrained legs are hurting, but at least they won’t stay untrained for long. Annoyingly it wasn’t even that pretty, as mid Cornwall just looks a bit like Leicestershire or something. Perfectly nice but not worth the effort in this case. Maggie is also home to a million different squeaks and rattles which are slowly driving me mad. I think every one of her nuts and bolts has a different noise, partly because I probably didn’t tighten everything up properly in the last minute bike maintenance rush. This culminated in one of my rear brake pads falling off on a fast descent on an

Sleeping location: Dock Inn, Penzance Distance (km today/total): 25 / 25 Estimated climb (m today/total): 350 / 350 Number of the day: zero Day in three words: Let’s do this And we’re off.  Today was the first day of something I’ve been building up to for months, years, who knows how long deep down, but to be honest it just felt like a nice bike ride around Cornwall. Right now the idea of actually cycling from here to Cape Town is so abstract that I can’t even comprehend it, which is probably for the best. The day: drove to Penzance, met the LEJoG team (my dad and his friends are doing Lands End to John o’Groats, I’m with them for the first few days), cycled to Lands End, cycled back to Penzance.  And that’s it really, no fireworks or marching band, no massive send off, just five of us bopping around Cornwall for a few hours. I don’t even remember the first pedal stroke. It’s kind of obvious but this is how it’s going to be; months and months of nice days that aren’t epic in th

Sleeping location: Premier Inn Bridgwater Distance (today/total): 0 / 0 Estimated climb (today/total): 0 / 0 Weight of panniers: 1 tonne Day in three words: Let's get going So I got the day number of the first post wrong as I forgot about zero (never forget about zero).  So this is day zero, not day minus one, which means it is Adventure Eve. We're driving down to Somerset this evening, staying overnight and pushing on to Penzance (and then Lands End) tomorrow. Spent much of the past few days fixing up Maggie and frantically stuffing things into various bags. I have too much (or badly packed) stuff, which I will need to rectify if I want to carry important things like food. Picture of the day - The Fox with the loaded up hire car. Maggie carelessly crushed at the bottom.